I said yes to going "out"with my husband and life has never been the same since. It is a funny story actually. He used to see me playing guitar in the folk group at church. He thought I was nice. Our children say he stalked me. At any rate, after a few dates, he asked me to go out with him. At that time that's what we called going steady. I said yes. The next morning my mother said "NO!" I cried, I begged, I pleaded. My sister convinced her it would be okay. How? She told mom, and I quote, "It won't last." Four and a half years later we walked down the aisle of the aforementioned church, my sister as the maid of honor, said "I do" and off we went into the happy sunshine and lived happily ever after. Okay, maybe not quite like that, but in the end, life is good.
After all, he was the one who remembered this is a special day, not me.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
Fear and Guilt
As I was praying for the gift of Fear during the Pentecost novena, I was struck that few people have fear or guilt any longer. Our society teaches young people to not fear anyone or anything and that guilt is a wasted feeling. There is no longer the sense that God is God and I am not. People have no fear of holding or expressing any and all views on God, sex, religion, or anyone different from themselves. This has led to a lack of respect of respect for authority. A middle school boy told me a story about an eighth grade boy beating up the assistant principal in the school cafeteria. It happened in our neighborhood school. How have we reached a point that a 13 year old boy has such little fear or respect for authority that he does this?
Fear and guilt were at one time considered useful and necessary. They taught us boundaries, what was acceptable and what was not, and when punishment really was deserved. Even in Church, we have changed Fear of the Lord to Awe, but it lacks the true weight that Fear does in this case. Fear of the Lord is not about quivering in our shoes, but about a true acknowledgement of One who is greater than I. Therefore, I am subject to his authority and do not want to cause division in our relationship. And when I do cause division, I should feel guilty until I make amends. Sadly, many people equate fear and guilt with a fierce and vengeful God instead of viewing them as tools to help us live the right way with God and each other.
Fear and guilt were at one time considered useful and necessary. They taught us boundaries, what was acceptable and what was not, and when punishment really was deserved. Even in Church, we have changed Fear of the Lord to Awe, but it lacks the true weight that Fear does in this case. Fear of the Lord is not about quivering in our shoes, but about a true acknowledgement of One who is greater than I. Therefore, I am subject to his authority and do not want to cause division in our relationship. And when I do cause division, I should feel guilty until I make amends. Sadly, many people equate fear and guilt with a fierce and vengeful God instead of viewing them as tools to help us live the right way with God and each other.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Women's Group
For about three years now I have been leading a bible study on Tuesday mornings at church. We have done many different studies and read different books. Tomorrow though, we begin a new adventure in praying the scriptures, using Lectio Divina. I am no expert, but one of our deacons came and led us through a gospel reading and it was a great experience for everyone.
We are going to do this during the summer. I am looking forward to this very much. It is always exciting to see what God reveals to us as we read his word.
We are going to do this during the summer. I am looking forward to this very much. It is always exciting to see what God reveals to us as we read his word.
In Another's Words
"Again and again our Lord said: I am he, I am he who is highest. I am he whom you love. I am he in whom you delight. I am he whom you serve. I am he whom you long. I am he whom you desire. I am he whom you intend. I am he who is all. I am he whom the Holy Church preaches and teaches to you. I am he who showed himself before to you. "
Julian of Norwich
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Real Women, Real Saints
I finally took some time to review the book I've had for an embarrassingly long time on my desk. And of course, I wish I had looked at it sooner. But, enough of that, on to the review.
Real Women, Real Saints: Friends for your Spiritual Journey by Gina Loehr is a great way to learn about the great women saints of our Church.
The book is organized into seven chapters, each chapter extolling saints of one particular virtue, such as Faith, Justice or Prudence and then listed in alphabetical order. Loehr's style is very down to earth and easy to read. She tells us the name of the saint, when she lived, what her roles were, feast day, and patronage.
As I usually do I first look if there is a saint with my name or close to my name. No. Then I look for my daughter's whose name comes from Elizabeth and of course, there are a few; St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, St. Elizabeth of Portugal, Blessed Elisabetta Canori Mora all make an appearance. After that I check for my favorite saints, St. Catherine of Siena, St. Clare, St. Margaret of Scotland, all present and accounted for along with contemporary saints including St. Gianna and Dorthy Day. Loehr does an excellent job of choosing saints from our 2000 year history.
Each entry is brief, to the point, and informative. She also ties in sainthood to real life. The saints' struggles or flaws are not glossed over, but offered as evidence of God working within us to change and grow, even into sainthood.
The only thing I would have liked to see in the book was an alphabetical index of saints, for ease in looking up a particular person.
I think this would make an excellent gift to any young or not so young woman trying to find her place in the world and in need of positive role models.
This review was written as part of the Catholic book Reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Real Women, Real Saints.
Real Women, Real Saints: Friends for your Spiritual Journey by Gina Loehr is a great way to learn about the great women saints of our Church.
The book is organized into seven chapters, each chapter extolling saints of one particular virtue, such as Faith, Justice or Prudence and then listed in alphabetical order. Loehr's style is very down to earth and easy to read. She tells us the name of the saint, when she lived, what her roles were, feast day, and patronage.
As I usually do I first look if there is a saint with my name or close to my name. No. Then I look for my daughter's whose name comes from Elizabeth and of course, there are a few; St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, St. Elizabeth of Portugal, Blessed Elisabetta Canori Mora all make an appearance. After that I check for my favorite saints, St. Catherine of Siena, St. Clare, St. Margaret of Scotland, all present and accounted for along with contemporary saints including St. Gianna and Dorthy Day. Loehr does an excellent job of choosing saints from our 2000 year history.
Each entry is brief, to the point, and informative. She also ties in sainthood to real life. The saints' struggles or flaws are not glossed over, but offered as evidence of God working within us to change and grow, even into sainthood.
The only thing I would have liked to see in the book was an alphabetical index of saints, for ease in looking up a particular person.
I think this would make an excellent gift to any young or not so young woman trying to find her place in the world and in need of positive role models.
This review was written as part of the Catholic book Reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Real Women, Real Saints.
Surprises
Last Sunday was a different Mother's Day for me. I had no children with me at all. I spoke with my son in the morning and skyped with my daughter at night. In between I was at church for the Spanish Mother's Day party. I've been thinking about my children on and off, since then , more than I usually do.
My children have totally surprised me as to the adults they are and I suppose still becoming.
As babies they were both easy, very easy. My daughter even easier than my son. Very different personalities and development though. Peter didn't walk until 15 months, Elisa before she was a year old. He was quiet, spoke only when necessary, she stared talking before 1. We often joke that both started to talk at the same time though they are 22 months apart. The shy boy eventually wanted to have everyone's attention, joined boy scouts in first grade and became an Eagle Scout. Our talkative, outspoken girl became quieter, but still a leader and the person her friends turned to for advice and decisions.
But, if you had asked me who would leave us, never her, not in a million years. Our son, out the door, far off places, explore the unknown. Boy was I wrong.
I skype with my daughter because she is in Australia for a semester. She planned it all, made the arrangements, and is having a great time. She keeps talking about going back. She went on vacation to Singapore and stayed in a hostel with her friends from school. Our son lives here with us or in New York with family. Go figure. Not what I ever thought if I had to venture a guess. My son would be on the other side of the world and my daughter close to home.
Peter tolerated school as a means to an end. He has a degree in Culinary Arts and is on his way to becoming a chef. Elisa loved Math and wanted to be an oral surgeon. After being in college for two years now, she is an English major but thinking about changing to Religion because she loves learning about religions. Who knows what the future holds for my two children? Will there be more surprises? I think so.
Do you think we surprise God? Do you think when he created us he peeked to the end of our life to see what paths we would choose and which we would not? Or does he wait and watch us growing, getting closer to him, stopping, wandering off the path, coming back, trying with all our will to do his will?
I bet he watches and like moms, sometimes he cries, sometimes laughs, sometimes smiles, and occasionally wants to make me do it his way; but in the end, he loves. And this, is what moms do, we love.
My children have totally surprised me as to the adults they are and I suppose still becoming.
As babies they were both easy, very easy. My daughter even easier than my son. Very different personalities and development though. Peter didn't walk until 15 months, Elisa before she was a year old. He was quiet, spoke only when necessary, she stared talking before 1. We often joke that both started to talk at the same time though they are 22 months apart. The shy boy eventually wanted to have everyone's attention, joined boy scouts in first grade and became an Eagle Scout. Our talkative, outspoken girl became quieter, but still a leader and the person her friends turned to for advice and decisions.
But, if you had asked me who would leave us, never her, not in a million years. Our son, out the door, far off places, explore the unknown. Boy was I wrong.
I skype with my daughter because she is in Australia for a semester. She planned it all, made the arrangements, and is having a great time. She keeps talking about going back. She went on vacation to Singapore and stayed in a hostel with her friends from school. Our son lives here with us or in New York with family. Go figure. Not what I ever thought if I had to venture a guess. My son would be on the other side of the world and my daughter close to home.
Peter tolerated school as a means to an end. He has a degree in Culinary Arts and is on his way to becoming a chef. Elisa loved Math and wanted to be an oral surgeon. After being in college for two years now, she is an English major but thinking about changing to Religion because she loves learning about religions. Who knows what the future holds for my two children? Will there be more surprises? I think so.
Do you think we surprise God? Do you think when he created us he peeked to the end of our life to see what paths we would choose and which we would not? Or does he wait and watch us growing, getting closer to him, stopping, wandering off the path, coming back, trying with all our will to do his will?
I bet he watches and like moms, sometimes he cries, sometimes laughs, sometimes smiles, and occasionally wants to make me do it his way; but in the end, he loves. And this, is what moms do, we love.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
In Another's Words
"By contrition we are made clean, by compassion we are made ready, and by true longing for God we are made worthy."
Julian of Norwich
Julian of Norwich
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