Blessed Columba Marmion from the Magnifcat, 8/16/09
I seek to be in union with Christ so that I have the fullness of life and that in turn I can share that fullness with others. The difficulty lies in my lack of faith in myself. I believe that union with Christ can come about with frequent reception to the sacraments, especially Confession and Eucharist. I also believe that I block the union because I do not always want the responsibility that comes with that union. There is also doubt that God can work through me. And yet, I do desire that union with Christ to be mine each day. What does the life of a person who aspires to understand the greatness of life look like? Right now I am working on getting rid of the fear which at times paralyzes me. I do this with prayer and the sacraments.Each day I receive communion I pray that this day I will be as Christ like as possible in all my dealings with people. And each day, I fall short. Usually it is the fault of my tongue. Either I over use it or under use it. It is over used when I say things I shouldn't about others or let little things out that should not be said to to others. It is under used when I stay silent when people are judgemental or mock people. It is also under used when I don't remind people of what our purpose is as a parish in discussions.
Sometimes it is my emotions, which I allow to ride roughshod over my thoughts and actions. Faith is like love in that it is much more than a feeling, it is something which gives meaning to my life and propels me to be much better person. It is what sustains me in difficulties. And yet, I allow my emotions to take over instead of focusing on Christ. Julian of Norwich, in her revelations speaks about wanting only to focus on Christ because she was afraid that if she saw something else, she would forget what she was about. Sometimes, that is how I feel. If I sat each day in the chapel and focused on Christ on the cross and in the tabernacle I would not have difficulty being in union with Christ. But that is not the life I lead.
So, how does a person achieve this sublime reality Marmion speaks of? Prayer, sacraments, and community are my answers. What are yours?