Have you ever experienced spiritual dryness in your
soul? You pray, go to Mass, read
scripture and it all seems pointless.
St. Ignatius calls this desolation.
This has been my state for the last two weeks and somehow, it was
triggered by my body.
In the past, my go to stress reliever or problem solver
was food first and then God. Since
making a very conscious decision to stop and changing my habits it has been
working. Until I reached a weight loss
plateau coupled with a shoulder injury and my will to keep moving forward left
me. My prayer now is simply asking to
have the strength to continue on the right path and keep moving forward; knowing
that if I do things will improve. I know
I do not want to go back to my old habits but they seem so comforting right
now. It’s one thing to sacrifice and see rewards but to sacrifice and not see
rewards is a bit depressing.
My body and soul are in sync which would be great if they
were in consolation but I sit here in desolation. St. Ignatius advises that in
desolation one should keep following whatever plan was made before desolation. I am taking his advice knowing that consolation
will come again.
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